Goal

Short post, just so I get it in writing. My goal is to lose 5 lbs by March 1. That will be 185. :)

I am Stronger than Food

^ This is my new mantra. I am stronger than food. I will not let food rule me. Define me. Craze me. All it does is provide sustenance. I don't have to give it the power to make me happy or to make me cry. Mind over matter. I will do this.

xoxo, 

Why, Hello 2015

I obviously am not that great at keeping a blog. But, being that it's a new year, I figured it couldn't hurt to put my goals down in writing. :)

You know how when you see someone you haven't seen for a while and they ask what's new? My answer for the past 5 years has been nothing. Absolutely nothing is new. I know that's not true, but the small things that have changed are not exciting enough to share with the acquaintance. I want to change that. I will make this the year I'm excited to share about.

Resolutions. I've made them. It's the year I don't break them.

This year I will:

Loselbs. in 2015

I have fitness and health goals every year. And I sort of do them every year. But I never get where I want to go. I want to finally feel better. This is the year. I will do this. 50 pounds puts me at my goal. I want to finally feel better and I want to do it before I'm 30. I've almost spent 10 years not loving who I am. That's crap. I love me now and I will love my self when I reach my goal. 50 pounds is a 1 pound a week goal. That is not even bad! Doing this. I am also giving up cookies, candy and cake. It worked well last time. Adam is giving up soda. My starting weight is 189.6. Here are our before photos:

I'm going to put more effort in at work. My goal is to sell 15 life insurance policies in 15. The more invested in my job, the more bonuses we'll get out of it. I know I could be a lot more productive than I am. I'm going to make my 8 hours a day worth it

I am a Black Status Presenter with Younique. I know it's in there. It is me. Today I may look Blue to the world, but in 2015 my Black will shine through. I'm good at this. I'm good at make up. People love me. The only thing holding me back is lack of effort. On the same subject, I think I have finally found my passion. I want to be a professional make up artist some day. My sweet mother in law gave me some books on looks that I am already just loving. I will watch professional videos and learn from them until I have the money to attend professional classes.

Well. There it is. And the potato believes. So I believe. This is the year!

Until Next Time, 

Day 5 - A picture of your favorite memory

Day 4 - A picture of your night

This is my typical Saturday Night. :)

Day 3 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show

I am soooo excited for this to start again!!

Day 2 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest

 

Karen! Thank you for all the years of love. You are my soul mate.

Day 1 - Photo of yourself and 10 facts

1. My favorite color is green.
2. I love animals, especially rats, cats and horses.
3. I love to read.
4. I am really good at customer service.
5. I worry a lot about most everything.
6. I have no idea what I want to be "when I grow up".
7. I hate tomatos.
8. I have a black belt in karate.
9. I haven't played my oboe in 5 years.
10. I love being married.

30 Day Photo Challenge

I've decided to do this trendy photo challenge, but not publically... I'd rather put it here where only a couple of you ever look anyway. So here goes!

Give thy thoughts no tongue - Shakespeare

I was up half the night with thoughts of things I wanted to say. High horses I wanted to tumble. Feelings I wanted to hurt. Accusations I wanted to defend. Knives I wanted to twist. This morning I woke up hollow and exhausted.

All anyone is doing in life is looking out for themselves. You must do things for yourself. Regardless if they are actions that are perceived as selfish or selfless, you are still doing them for yourself. For the feelings that make it tolerable, worthwhile or even exciting to get up in the morning. Whatever works for you, you will do it. We help people. We love people. We build others up or we cut people loose. The end result is the beautiful work of art entitled Our Life. We are all the center of our own creation. I will never feel guilty for how I have chosen to paint my picture.

Being selfish to me means that you have to look out for yourself and you don't have to sacrifice. ~ Herbie Mann

Flying Skillets!

I'm having one of those off days where nothing about myself is pleasing me. Buuuut, rather than focus on that, I want to tell you about a weird dream I had last night.

I dreamt I was in a canoe on a river and I kept flooding it, which was no big deal because I could just stand up and dump it out. I was having all sorts of fun zooming around in my little canoe. Other people were there, but I don't remember who. Then I found this skillet, decided to sit in it and suddenly was flying! It made me feel happy and complete. Then I woke up. So apparently I need to find my magic flying skillet and I will be happy!

I'm really excited that Planet Fitness is finally open and that Adam actually wants to go with me. I have a lot banking on this change. I hope I don't let myself down.

Mixed Feelings

I have very mixed feelings about blogging. In high school I maintained a blog I poured all my feelings and emotions into only to have it used as a joke at my expense. I recently stumbled upon that blog, reread every entry and then deleted it in it's entirety. I was an emotional and expressive teenager. I didn't feel like those troubling times needed to exist in the written form any more.

That being said, I am older now. I feel that I can express my feelings in a way as to not make this become about gossip and hurt people. We'll see who I share this with and we'll see how long it lasts. But hey, it's always fun to write. :)